Caring for Parents Who Didn’t Care for You

Author: AB Staff

Caring for Parents Who Didn’t Care for You

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Some people may have parents who treated them badly in the past (and perhaps even to this day). As a result, such individuals have a sad and traumatic domestic life that may have also left them scarred them for life. Sure, it can be hard taking care of someone whom you have a rift with, but these tips may help you get past those issues and may even help you move on with your life without resentment and bitterness.

Take Care of Yourself First

This is a given. After all, how can you take care of someone if you are not prepared physically, mentally, and emotionally? Make sure to maintain your overall health so you can be able to take care of someone to the best of your ability. There are also support groups you can join to lessen the feeling of the burden of taking care of a rather difficult patient that can be your own parent.

Leave the Past Behind and Stick to the Present

Moving beyond the traumatic past may not be easy at all, even if there’s a popular saying that goes “To err is human, to forgive is divine”. More so, the situation may further be complicated when you have to take care of your sick elderly parent who was mainly responsible for your unhappy past.

Forgiving someone who did wrong to you can be easier said than done. If you want to be an effective caregiver, focus on the present rather than dwelling on the past. What has happened in the past cannot be changed anymore, but you can choose to move on and eventually learn to forgive. You can also try to build a new relationship with your estranged parents. It can be awkward at first, but the experience may eventually be worth it.

It can be an emotional dilemma on your part – taking care of someone major in your life that also treated you badly. On one hand, forgiving your aging parent who had done you wrong should be a given. On the other hand, it is easier said than done.

Consider Your Parents’ Past as Well

If you have experienced bad things from your now-aging parents, their past actions may most probably due to their own unpleasant past as well. Nonetheless, it is best to move forward and do what you have to do – take care of your aging parent on their remaining days.

Be Proud of Yourself!

This is one way to feel accomplished and do what is right even though it can be mentally and emotionally challenging on your part. More importantly, your good ways will be rewarded at some point in your life, whether you believe in Karma or not.

Other Options for Elderly Care

There are a lot of assisted living homes available, as well as employing a full-time home care aide for the elderly. However, it may cost some cash if you choose this option. You can check out these tools to help you weigh in your decision.

Senior care calculator

Retirement Calculator

Social Security Retirement Estimator

Personal Finance Calculator

Do you think the simple tips above are useful? Did we miss anything that should be included in the list? Do you have other suggestions that you think can be useful as well? Let us know in the comments. You can also connect with other users via our Finance forum and Finance directory.